What Does That Scale Say?
Oh Hell….YES!!! It has been exactly three weeks since I started this new way of life. I cannot call it a “diet” or else I am screwed. If I call it a “diet” then I will fail. I need to call it the new way I am going to live. Yes, I eat like a rabbit, but that is totally beside the point. I am a healthy rabbit. Rabbits live longer and eat healthy, right? I have never loved protein bars so much. Maybe because they are chocolate or fake chocolate or give me the feeling of eating something sweet but whatever it is, I like it. The new me feels great and I have some news to share. Some big news to share and it’s not my waist line. It is the amount of weight I have lost in three weeks. To some it may not be a lot but to me, it is like I want to scream it from the Empire State Building or maybe just the street but still, I want to yell. EIGHT POUNDS. You’re probably thinking, hey bitch, you have so much fucking weight to lose so shut the fuck up. But you all listen to me right now. I told you all I was changing my life and this was the year of me. I am updating you all once a month. This is the first eight. I am only shouting it from my street for now, but I promise you, and you all just wait…
This bitch will be shouting from the Empire State Building soon even if my skin is green from all that lettuce. Okay, maybe I should get my ass to the gym soon since I got this eating thing down. Shit, I did hear they have updated treadmills in the last 10 years since I worked out last, and there is this thing called Pilates and yoga.
I’m off to run… people still do that…right?