Swearing

I'm giving it up!

This year my motto is: The New Me. What does that really mean? Do you understand it? Do you guys care to understand it? Well, let me explain.

Yeah, I'm fed up with my weight, so I changed that, and yes I'm fed up with so many other things and I'm working on those too. I'm trying to improve Ashley, so that when you see me later in 2015 or in 2016 or maybe in 2040 when I have tons of wrinkles you can say ‘wow’, she changed. Well, maybe by 2040 they will have some really good face creams that will help all of us ladies with our wrinkles, but that’s beside the point. Are you understanding The New Me yet?

Here is another new change that I am making today. This is a tough one. I mean a really tough one. It's my mouth. It's the words that come out of it. The SWEARING. I'm officially stopping. Caput! Quitting cold turkey. Done like dinner. Sure, we all swear once in a while but not this momma. No more ‘shut the front doors’ and no more ‘mother f’er’’. I’m done. If you see me in the streets with a bleeding lip, it only means that I bit my lip hard because I wanted to swear really bad and stopped myself. I’m going to try it. One day at a time, like the diet, I mean the new way of life. Maybe I'll start making up fake words and nobody will know what I'm talking about. So, if I stop swearing does that mean I will wear an apron when my husband gets home and live in an imaginary world with white picket fences? You know, those wives where they are beyond nice and nothing bad ever comes out of their mouths? Isn't that what they show in the movies? Heck (see, not swearing) no!

Maybe I can't do this! Wait, yes I can. I can do anything I put my mind to dammit. Uh oh. I just broke my rule! Well, today is day one so I can give myself a little break, right?

The New Me. Kind of has a new ring to it, don’t ya think?

Ashley Gold